Forever
by LuxahHeart
Summary: Forever has many meanings, but for one boy it is more of a curse. Yaoi, Kai and Ray. Angst and drama, Very short fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

 **So this is a very short fic that kind of came to me, it's already done but I will post it over a period of time just so I can get feedback from those that wish to give it. This is sad, angsty, and will have mentions of death pretty much through out.**

 **Hope you all enjoy it either way though. Just for an update on everything else (if you're a regular reader of my works) everything is on hold except for Parent Trap (and obviously this one of course.) until I get settled in the new place.**

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"You're leaving me?" Ray breathed out, barely above a whisper as his voice trembled and his heart sunk into the pit of his stomach.  
He had tried to look, stare, into Kai's eyes, but the other man had his head downcast, as if his feet and the ground beneath them were more interesting.

"W... Why? What did I do wrong?" Ray had finally found his voice, grabbing hold of Kai's arm in an almost death like grip, his claws digging into his flesh though Kai didn't even flinch; he deserved all the pain he got for doing this to Ray.

"It's not- "Don't give me that bullshit, 'it's not you, it's me' line. Cus guess what, I already knew you weren't going to be easy, this was never going to be easy, but I thought we were doing good... I thought we were happy." Ray's speech had started out strong, like a fire, until his words burned down, and he once again felt the crushing weight in his chest; maybe Kai wasn't happy?

"I was going to say, it's not that you did anything wrong." Kai still spoke evenly, his smooth voice the same as it always was, as if doing this had no ill effect on his person.

"Then why?" Ray pleaded, his voice cracking.

"You know why... Ray... You're fixing to be twenty-eight, while I'm still... Like this!" He motioned to himself with his free arm, the anger now evident in his ruby eyes as he showed off the body and stature of an 18 year old boy.

"We talked about this before though, it doesn't matter to me." Ray shook his head, a smirk on his lips as he realized Kai was just having another one of his unnecessary panic fits about this, it was no different when he had turned twenty-five and Kai had tried to call things off then.

Kai shook his head hard, running his free hand through his slate colored bangs. "It may not matter to you, but it matters to me. I can't just sit by and watch you keep aging, when I can't. Eventually you're going to go gray, and people are going to notice. Then... One day... You won't be here..." Kai fought around the lump in his throat just to finish that sentence.

"Damn what other people think, it's not like you have ever cared to begin with. And I'm not that old yet, we still have time." Ray tried, no one can say he never tried, but Kai simply shook his head again at him with a sigh; he wasn't backing down this time.

"And what are we going to tell people when you're thirty and I still look like this? We can't very well go off and tell them 'my boyfriend's immortal, he's actually the same age as me'. They'd hunt me down and experiment on me, that's how I got in this mess to begin with in case you forgot.

"And you think it's going to be easy, has been easy, to watch everyone around me age like normal? It'll be hard enough to watch Tyson and Max age and go, but don't ask me to watch you do it!" Kai snapped angrily, finally showing some emotion, but it wasn't the kind Ray was really looking for.

Ray's mouth had fallen open, speechless for a comeback. He wanted to, but his words were stuck in his throat as tears formed in his golden eyes. What he wouldn't give to be by Kai's side, but clearly Kai couldn't, wouldn't, be by his any longer.

A silence loomed over them and now it was Ray's turn to stare at the ground beneath their feet, the grass bending in the gentle breeze. Having come to their spot in the field not too far from the park they all used to train in when they were teens, they were supposed to be out here on a date, how did it end up like this when it had been going so well before?

Kai had been watching Ray for a reaction, his ebony bangs having almost covered his entire face from view. His hand was still clamped around Kai's arm, but now it was slightly trembling instead of the death grip it had moments ago.

"I'm not... I didn't want to hurt you..." Kai's voice was carried by the breeze, and if it wasn't for Ray's heightened sense of hearing he wouldn't have heard the words at all.

With his free hand, Kai brushed Ray's bangs back and gently tucked them behind a pointed ear. Tears finally broke free, running down Ray's face and he pushed his cheek into Kai's warm hand, who brushed the smooth skin with his thumb, receiving a purr from the other; he was going to miss that sound.

Kai stepped forward and placed a kiss to Ray's cheek and then his lips, where he lingered longer than he should have before he pulled away. His arm was free now, so he took the opportunity to step back far enough where Ray couldn't grab him again, their eyes locked as he continued to step back from him.

He watched as Ray bit into his bottom lip, knowing full well there were more words he wanted to say, more reasons for him to stay. And it hurt, it was the worse pain he had ever felt as he watched the man before him get his heart crushed. It was his fault, Kai knew, he shouldn't have ever done this, but that night when Ray had come to him all those years ago, he just couldn't say no.  
"I love you." Hung in the air between them, Kai's back turned as if the words weren't going to be able to hurt him anymore if he couldn't see Ray's broken face.

"I love you too." Was stuck in his throat, unable to say the words he knew Ray wanted to hear but couldn't bring himself to say.  
He kept walking down the hill and out of sight, leaving Ray alone where the remains of their picnic sat just behind him. The sun was starting to set, the sky changing into reds and oranges, as if the world was catching on fire. Any other time Ray would have marveled at the sight, but this time he collapsed under the setting sun onto the grassy hill top, his tears full force as he felt his entire being shatter.


	2. Chapter 2

The Beyblading world mourned when news hit, there wasn't a dry eye for days and it was the headline for the entire month on all the papers and news stations; Kai Hiwatari found dead from apparent overdose.

Ray had scoffed, shaking his head when he had read the headlines. He wasn't surprised that Kai would have had to fake his death, he was only surprised he had done so barely three months after he called their relationship off. He was a bit shocked that Kai chose overdosing as his way to go, though with the way the media ate it up it was like he knew it was the only way to go without bringing up any kind of suspicion.

There was no funeral, as stated in the will that had been found by the 'body', how much he had paid off the authorities was something Ray always wondered. The wealth Kai had inherited from his grandfather went to the BBA, apparently Dickenson knew of Kai's 'condition' and Ray figured the elderly man was going to be able to keep funneling Kai's money back to him.

Everything that had happened after the headlines had broken went by fast, and not once had Ray ever seen Kai again after that day on the hill. Though Ray wasn't all that surprised, just disappointed.

It had been some years before he allowed himself to fall in love again, wanting to give himself the time to get over Kai and when he did, he fell hard for this other man and it wasn't until the newspapers put out the headlines for his own wedding, like they had for all the other major Bey Bladers, did he see Kai again.

It was his wedding day, that Kai had decided to make himself known to Ray once more. He had gone the lengths of dying his hair, letting it grow down to the middle of his back. He had gained a substantial amount of more muscle than before, for what an 18 year old body could handle. To anyone else, he looked like a fit and normal teenager, nobody would have known that he was THE Kai Hiwatari in those seats, watching his ex-teammate, ex-lover, getting married.

Ray knew, it didn't matter what Kai had done to his hair or his body to try and keep up the charade of being dead. He knew those eyes all too damn well to not know it was him, who stared and smiled as he said his I do's to his new lover, who finally approached him after the ceremony and danced with him; for old times' sake.

"Why did you come?" Ray asked, the words had been on the tip of his tongue the entire night.

Kai shrugged, he wasn't exactly sure why he had come, he just knew he wanted to be there with him, even if it was just for a few hours.

"So much for not watching me age..." Ray muttered angrily, getting a snort in response from his dancing partner.

"You look good for a thirty-two year old." Kai smiled warmly, getting a playful slap in the arm.

"That's no way to talk to your 'uncle'." Ray laughed, and it was real.

For so long he had hated Kai, for leaving him the way he had, even if he understood why, but tonight he was just glad he had come; he had missed looking into those damn eyes. All that hate was gone for tonight, and they were friends once more.

"Are you happy?" Kai asked as he spun Ray around, trying to keep up the charade of uncle and nephew sharing a dance instead of two ex-lovers.

The smile that had been on Ray's face all night dropped and he stopped at arm's length, stopping the spin back to Kai. He released Kai's hand, and Kai could see him thinking over his answer.

"I am." He lied, and Kai could see the lie within Ray's eyes, could hear it in his voice. "Are you?" He asked after a second or two of silence.

Kai shrugged his shoulders once more. "I get by." He held his hand out once more for Ray to take and smiled once Ray took it again and finally completed their dance.

It was almost painful when they said goodbye, when Kai watched the two newlyweds drive away with the biggest smiles on their faces as Ray waved frantically out the window to the guests that had stayed later. Their eyes met and held, a bit longer than they should have, and they both smiled to one another like old friends. Yet inside, as the car drove out of sight, Kai felt the burning anger in the pit of his stomach.

He fought himself the rest of the night, as he lie awake, memories of the past playing in his mind along with tonight. The smile Ray had worn throughout the entire wedding, even when Kai could see that he was getting tired. The longer he lay thinking about it; the ceremony, the vows, the kiss... The anger was back, almost ten-fold as he remembered that kiss. Though he had no right to be angry, he knew that, but it didn't matter. He was now burning with that anger in his stomach, cursing himself for ever letting Ray go.  
He tried to subside the anger by telling himself it was for the better, and for a while it worked because of how happy Ray looked, but it was still hard; it was still unfair.

That was the last he had actually seen Ray, and Ray had seen him. Over the years he kept a watchful eye on him, to make sure his husband was the man he thought he was, and Kai was happy to know that he was. It was never easy seeing the two together, still wrapped in their love like Kai had seen on their wedding day almost five years ago.

He thought it would get better, but it never did, and he finally snapped. After having watched the house for days, making sure he knew Rays husband's schedule to a fine point before he made his move. He wasn't sure if he had been so scared in his life, but it was too late now. He was already standing in the middle of the kitchen, having broken through the back door, when Ray came around the corner and almost jumped out of his skin.

"Fucking Christ Kai, what the hell are you doing in my house?!" Ray asked, his hand still placed over his rapidly beating heart.

Kai's mouth opened to speak but his words didn't come out, and Ray could see the confusion in his eyes as he tried to say something.  
Ray sighed shaking his head, some wisps of white mixed with the black.

"C'mon and sit down with me." He coaxed Kai into the living room, the other male following quietly.

The two sat in silence, Kai's leg nervously twitching as he sat across from Ray in his living room. He shouldn't be here, there was a reason he let Ray go all those years ago, and now he was stuck because of his own stupidity and selfishness.

"You dyed your hair again." Ray finally broke the silence, taking in the dark blue hair Kai now had. "Looks good." He mused, getting a smirk in return.

"You're getting gray hairs." There was a lump in his throat, when it had gotten there he wasn't sure, and his words came out almost hoarse.

Ray only chuckled, brushing back a bang. "Why are you here?" He asked, golden eyes meeting crimson.

"I wanted to see you."

"Why?" Ray asked, and there was no mistaking the anger in his tone. "Wasn't the whole point of this was so you WOULDN'T see me?" He all but yelled, his fists balling together between his knees as he bent forward on the couch.

"It was... But- "Don't you dare say you miss me!" Ray practically hissed, his pupils wavering, and Kai's mouth snapped shut. Ray pushed himself from his seat in a fury, his fists shaking at his sides as he began to pace angrily in the center of his living room.  
"Don't do this... Don't do this to me... Not... Not after all this time!" He yelled, though he never met Kai's eyes with his.  
"How dare you do this to me! You didn't want to see this! You didn't want this!" Angry tears were rolling down his cheeks, and he hadn't even noticed when Kai had stood and taken hold of his arms in a gentle hold, standing before him.

"That doesn't mean I still didn't want you." Kai argued back, only for Ray to shake his head.

"Then you should have kept me." He half sobbed, fighting back a purr as Kai's hands rubbed his back in small circles.

Ray felt himself inch closer to Kai's chest, his eyes slowly drifting closed as a purr finally erupted past his lips. He knew it was wrong, not when he wore that wedding band on his finger. He should have pushed Kai away, yelled at him some more for what he did, but he couldn't find it in himself to do so.

"Runaway with me..." Kai breathed into the top of Ray's hair.  
It was a while before Ray responded, his arms had come around Kai's body and he held onto him as if it would be the last time.

"I can't..."

"Please?"

"No." Ray pulled back in order to look into Kai's eyes. "No... I love my husband Kai... I'm sorry..."

Their lips were only inches apart, and like a hidden string was wrapped around them and pulling them closer, their eyes began to slip close the closer they got until Ray snapped out of it and pushed Kai back, hard, away from him.

"You need to leave..." His voice barely wavered in his order.

Kai gave him a questioning look and Ray could see that Kai wasn't going to go that easily.

"I mean it Kai, you need to leave... NOW." He ordered once more, and they both jumped when the sound of a key stuck into the lock in the front door. "Go out the back, quickly." Ray rushed him back to the kitchen, where Kai had come in before.  
He was pushing and shoving, ready to slam the door behind Kai as his husband was barely stepping through the front.

"I'm sorry." Kai muttered, trying his hardest not to grab Ray right then and there and just run off.

"Go, and don't come back..." Ray said, closing the door on Kai before he could say anything back.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Small Lemon/ Lime in this chapter.  
Thank you to those who have stopped by and read and either reviewed (Lookin at you Lin, you the real MVP) and followed. Two more chapters to go, enjoy. **

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Kai stood in the shadows cast by the trees that outlined the graveyard, his heart heavy as he watched Ray sob and cry as the casket was lowered into the ground. He already knew how fragile the life of mortals were but seeing Ray in this state caused more pain in him than he had ever experienced. Once more he had dyed his hair black, this time cutting it back to its older length when he was a teenager. Even though he wasn't physically aging anymore, he and Ray were now in their forties.

It had been ten years they had been married, Kai knew, because it was the most painful ten years of his life. He had given him up, and even though he had seen Ray five years ago; in an attempt to get him back, he still hadn't stayed away like he should have.  
This time though, it was Ray who had called him, crying in the middle of the night saying he needed him. It took less than ten minutes for Kai to arrive at Ray's home, looking for someone to kill for making Ray cry, but found out it had already been done for him. Ray's husband had been involved in a car accident and he didn't make it home.

That night Kai held Ray for the first time in almost twenty years and just let him cry himself to sleep in his arms, and even though Kai was there holding him, his own heart was breaking for Ray.

Once the casket had been lowered the other friends and family members all dispersed, leaving Ray alone on his chair before the gaping hole in the ground where his husband lay. Kai took his time to reach him, coming out from the tree line and beside him he placed a hand on his trembling shoulders. He was taken back when Ray placed his hand over his, holding onto his pale fingers tightly as he continued to sob, his head down as tears fell to the grassy ground.

"Thank you... For... For coming..." Ray sobbed out, patting the top of Kai's hand before sitting himself up, his back rigid and his eyes red and swollen from crying. "Should probably leave..." He told himself, though made no move to actually get up and leave.

"Take your time." Kai instructed gently, his hand not leaving Ray's shoulder.

The two stayed there in silence for an hour more, Kai wasn't going to push Ray to leave before he was ready, and Ray was silently thankful for that. He didn't, couldn't, leave just yet. It felt like there was so much more he should have, could have said, to his husband. Done so much more than what they had during their ten years of marriage, and what a wonderful marriage it had been. If it hadn't been for Kai leaving, he wouldn't have had the life he did.

"Thank you." Ray whispered before standing, getting a questioning look from Kai. "For giving me the life I had with him. Thank you."  
Kai was a bit speechless to those words, it wasn't like he had wanted to see Ray with someone else, but at the time he knew it would have been best and it just so happened that it was. Ray had been happy, even if it was without him and that in the end was all that mattered.

"You're welcome." Kai said, taking his hand back to his side.

"Let's go home." Ray took the initiative finally and headed towards his car, Kai following behind him silently thanking the other man in the ground for providing a good life for Ray.

The drive to Ray's wasn't uncomfortable, but Kai wondered what he was doing and why he was going with him. It wasn't until they stepped through the front doors did he realize why Ray had wanted him to come. He had collapsed in the doorway, breaking down in another fit of tears. Kai held him, just inside the doorway, running his fingers through his hair until Ray calmed down enough before he picked him up and placed him on the couch.

"I... I'm s... Sorry..." Ray barely managed to get out, wiping at his tear stained cheeks.

"You have nothing to apologize for." Kai simply replied, staying beside him and letting Ray decide if he wanted to be touched or held. He didn't think it right, to touch him in the old familiar ways just so soon. Ray nodded and dabbed at his eyes with a tissue, looking around his home that felt so much bigger now that it was just him.

"Stay." It wasn't a request, it was a demand. Kai arched a brow at him, his heart fluttering in his chest as Ray leaned closer to him.

"Stay with me..."

"For tonight.- "No, not just for tonight." Ray cut in, practically sitting on Kai's lap now as their eyes locked with each other's.

Hesitantly Kai reached out, touching the side of Ray's cheek gently and brushing back the few stray strands of hair; there were more gray hairs this time, before he gently cupped the back of Ray's head and pulled him the rest of the way before their lips met in a gentle and tender kiss.

Kai could feel Ray's body finally relax into his, a deep sigh escaping from him as his hands wound their way up Kai's sides, un-tucking his shirt before putting them against his skin. Kai jumped slightly from the gentle contact before deepening the kiss, pulling on Ray's legs till he was better situated on top of his own legs. Their lips barely parted for more than a minute before they were back against each other, in between their hands roamed and touched old and forgotten territory. Though to the other, they tasted the same as they had all those years ago.

When it had all began to get more heated, Kai wasn't sure, he just let Ray do what he wanted and set the pace he was comfortable with. It was soft at first, but now Ray was undressing him almost violently with a hasty aggression until he was laid back on the couch naked as the day he was born.

Kai couldn't even get his hands on Ray fast enough to disrobe him since Ray went to undressing himself the second the last of Kai's clothing had hit the floor. Just as fast as Kai had been stripped, Ray was now upon him and naked himself already getting himself ready for Kai to take him right then and there.

"Ray." Kai managed to stop him, just barely, with a hand to his chest and his eyes already asking his question.

It wasn't that Kai didn't want to, it was more of it being the right thing to do. Even though Ray seemed more than willing, would he really be alright with it in the morning, would he hate Kai more than he thought he did?

"I want this... Don't stop me." Ray warned in almost a growl. "I want you." Kai went to speak, though before he could Ray's mouth was upon his again in a hungry kiss and he was slipping himself over Kai's member.

Instinctively Kai pushed up, causing Ray to moan into his mouth and grip at his shoulders as he used them for support. Kai's own hands clamped around Ray's hips, just holding him in a loose hold as he let Ray do what he had wanted, like he had been before.  
The want and need to drive himself further into Ray became overbearing, and he grabbed his hips more roughly and drove himself into him. Ray's head snapped back as he let out a long drawn out moan, Kai's name coming out with it as he rotated his hips into Kai's own.

It didn't take much longer before they drove each other over the edge, coming harder than either of them could have remembered ever coming before. Leaving each other in a heap against the other with a sheen of sweat over their backs and foreheads, their breath coming in sharp intakes as Kai wrapped his arms around Ray's back in a protective hold before they both fell asleep.

That morning Ray had changed into someone else, at least Kai couldn't recall ever seeing him this angry before in his life. The way he yelled and screamed at him, threw books and plates at him. He knew he shouldn't have given into Ray's demands last night and now he was paying for it, and he wasn't about to stop him because he felt he deserved it.

"Get out, get out I never want to see you again! How could you do that? My husband just died for Christ's sake!" He yelled, another plate clutched in his hands as his pupils were slit in his anger.

Kai didn't put up a fight, just held his hands up defensively and left without a word. It wasn't until two months later did Ray call him back up, apologizing for how he had acted and for what they had done that night, relieving Kai of the blame and guilt he had been harboring since that night.

Another month passed before Ray called him back, needing help in moving out of his old house and into an apartment not too far from where Kai lived. After the move they saw each other more often, Ray coming over whenever he felt like it, and Kai never had the heart to tell him to stop.

Four months passed before Kai got the nerve to ask Ray out once more, just as he was nearing his early 50's. He was afraid Ray would have scoffed, yelled at him for missing his chance when they were still in their twenties. Instead, Ray smiled and looked him in the eyes and asked him what took him so long to ask.

To make up for all the lost time, Kai dug into his hidden and almost forgotten inheritance. He wanted to take Ray out, and that's exactly what he did, all over the world, only to be called back to Japan when Tyson had passed away at 85.

For the longest time Kai hadn't thought about death, having enjoyed his time with Ray and their adventures. Now, death seemed to have smacked him in the face and like a bad dream he was saying finally saying goodbye to one of his longest and oldest friends.  
Time was no longer on his side as he held Ray that night as he lie awake, listening and feeling Ray breathing; afraid that if he fell asleep he'd wake up alone.

Morning came, like it always had, and Ray was safe once more; for now.


	4. Chapter 4

**So this is the last chapter to this very short and sad fic. Thank you all to who took the time to stop by and read and reviewed, it means a lot to me.**

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"Are you scared?"

Kai paused, his hands stuck in Ray's now snow-white hair as the suds started to run down his arm. He hadn't been expecting that kind of question to come from his lover, not after they had just laughed and joked about their time at Max's 85th birthday party only a few hours ago. Now he didn't know how to respond, he wasn't even sure what kind of question it was Ray was asking him.

"…About what?" He finally managed out, continuing with washing Ray's hair for him as he sat between his legs in their garden tub.

"Being alone." Ray said as he tilted his head down, his voice coming out in a whisper.

"Let's not.- "NO!" Ray cut in. "We _need_ to discuss this Kai." Ray said a bit more firmly.

Kai didn't say a word as he pushed on Ray's back gently to get out from between him and the back of the tub, quickly grabbing his towel as he dripped water onto the tile floor.

"I am not discussing this with you Ray, not right now." Kai answered angrily, his eyes already burning into Ray's to let him know he wasn't joking. "Call me when you're done so I can help you out." He said a bit more calmly as he left the bathroom quickly.

Ray just sat there, his dull golden eyes looking down into the soapy water he was left sitting in. He knew his time on earth was coming to an end, he was nearly into his nineties now and even though his health was almost perfect for an 87 year old man, he knew it was almost time.

He never regretted getting back with Kai, they played the grandfather and grandson role to a perfect T when out in public, Kai had taken care of him well enough this long and Ray felt almost guilty when he no longer could take care of Kai in return due to his old age. Kai never said a word about it though, if anything he always looked happy whenever they were together; which was almost 24/7.

Ray sighed heavily, lifting his shaking arms to run his hands through his hair to finish the job Kai had left in his anger; even after all this time that was something that hadn't changed about his un-aging lover.

As Ray continued to run his fingers through his much shorter locks, his long hair becoming too much of a hassle as he got older, a sharp pain coursed through his left arm and he let out a gasp. His heart began to beat frantically in his chest and he lost almost all his breath in his lungs. He tried to move his legs to stand himself up, his right hand searching out the metal bar on the side of the wall, but he was in a panic now and his hand missed it.

"K… Kai…" He tried to shout but it came out in a gasp as he tried to stand himself up again, his heart beating faster in his panic.

The water in the tub tossed and turned as he tried to get out on his own, his hand still soaked with water and shampoo slipped once more from the bar and he fell to his knees.

"Kai!" He tried once more, this time his voice carrying his words loud enough through the bathroom, tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

Kai appeared in the bathroom before him in a blur, his vision coming in and out as he heard Kai speaking, yelling, at him and warm hands were holding him, but nothing was truly making sense. His heart was hurting as it felt it was about to break out of his chest, his mouth was going numb along with his arms.

When he woke up it was slow, his head felt heavy and his eyes didn't want to open for him at first. The soft rhythmic beep of his heart monitor was one of the first things he began to hear, and he forced his eyes to open so he could look around only to find himself laid up in a hospital bed. Once more panic was starting to set into his body, until he felt the weight of the bed beside him slightly dipped in where a young boy with two-toned hair was asleep, his head laid in the fold of his arms as he rested it on the side of the bed.

Ray reached out, gently shaking the teen awake from his slumber. Bright crimson orbs met his dull golden ones, and the panic that had been on the teen's face washed away like the snap of a finger.

"I thought I lost you." The teen breathed out, outstretching his hand for Ray's face.

Ray backed away and the boy frowned at him hard, letting his hand fall back onto the bed. "What's wrong?"

Ray's eyes danced around the room quickly, then back to the boy's. "Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital… You had a heart attack..." The boy said calmly, though Ray couldn't mistake the sadness that held in his tone.

"I see…" Ray said as his eyes darted around the room again. "And who are you?"

"…W-What?" The boy half chuckled out, searching Ray's face like Ray had done to him and there he saw it. Deep in his eyes, he could see that Ray didn't know who he was anymore.

He tried to answer him, but his words got stuck in his throat and he pushed himself away from the bed and turned his back to Ray. "I'll get the doctor." With that he left, wiping the tears that were falling down his face before anyone saw them.

It wasn't fair, not after all this time of being together once more that the universe would be so cruel and do this to him. It was as if his life had been some sick joke since the moment he was born, why did he let himself get so excited when they told him Ray would have been alright? Why did he even let himself fall in love with him to begin with?

Kai's fist hit the wall in the hall, not caring that he scared the two nurses who were stepping out of another patients room or caring that they could see his tears now freely rolling down his face. In his head he cursed his mother and father, for having ever deciding to give him life. He cursed his grandfather, for having him placed in the Abbey where he became a guinea pig for all his sadistic ideals. He cursed himself, for letting himself get attached to anyone when he knew of the consequences.

"Excuse me… Mr. Hiwatari?" A timid looking nurse called out to him, having not even heard her approach him.

Kai turned to her, letting his arm drop limply to his side. "What?" He asked hoarsely.

"The doctor would like to speak to you about your grandfather." She said and turned for him to follow.

For once Kai had wished that it was true, that it was his actual grandfather on that bed who didn't know who he was, who was just another step closer to death's door. Instead it was his lover, the man he had fallen for so long ago. The one person he knew he couldn't let go, no matter how hard he had tried. He wanted to scream at the top of his lungs in anger and anguish, but instead he followed her quietly back to the room; he didn't even look back at Ray sitting on the bed to his left.

"It seems your grandfather has a case of dementia, it might have been brought on by the heart attack, but we can't be fully certain given his age. We'll be keeping him over night, you're more than welcome to stay with him and talk to him. Sometimes they'll remember small things bit by bit, all we can do is keep him comfortable and not scare him."

The doctor continued to ramble about the new diagnosis to Kai, but he began to not hear a word he was saying. His heart shattering the longer he stood there, having to listen and have this put on his shoulders. How this all happened was still a question he wanted to ask, but he never got the chance to as the doctor left the room after his ramblings.

"You came back." Ray's voice called out, bringing Kai out of his stupor and the silence in the room finally broken.

"I couldn't leave you." Would have been what he'd have said if he was speaking to the Ray who remembered him, instead he just nodded and sat back down beside the bed.

"They told me you're my grandson… But we look nothing alike." Ray began to jabber like the doctor had done in a very old man fashion, something he had never truly done before.

Kai didn't really know what to say to him, so he just sat there on his chair in silence. Eventually Ray fell asleep, and Kai chanced a look at him and couldn't help but feel his heart break completely. Holding back fresh tears he leaned over and moved Ray's bangs away from his face, kissing him gently on the forehead.

"Yes… I am scared."

* * *

The next day wasn't any easier when Kai signed the papers to take Ray home, nor was it easy having to try and tell Ray who he was and where they were going. It was even more difficult when Kai decided not to tell Ray who they actually were to each other, having to sleep on the couch in the living room as they only had one bed and it would have been too awkward to have slept together like they always had done before.

Over the course of the week it got a little better, Ray would forget important things, but could remember small things like Driger and his village; something the doctor said was possible, but it didn't make things any easier on Kai when all he wanted to do was hold him one more time.

He tried a month later after Ray had the heart attack, and for a minute as Kai explained who they actually were to each other it looked as though Ray has a hint of recognition in his eyes, but the moment Kai felt a little hope that he may have remembered, Ray burst out into laughter and shook his head at him; at least he had tried.

He did his best to keep Ray as comfortable as possible, the couch becoming his permanent bed now as the months rolled on and it got harder with each passing day as the heart attack off set more problems for Ray. The doctors were giving him less than three months left, but like the fool he was Kai held onto hope that he would last till the end of the year, and for once the universe granted him his final wish.

It was a cold spring day when Kai laid Ray into the ground, in a small plot in the field and under the tree they would always come to in their teens. There was no headstone, or anything fancy and it was just him there now standing under the tree as he let the cold breeze blow around him. He was numb to it, just like he was numb to everything now. He had informed Max, Hilary and Kenny of Ray's passing but they gave him his space for the day and would come tomorrow. Beside him at his feet sat his suit case, in it he had some clothes and his and Ray's beyblades.

He stood there till the sun began to sink, most in silence but he at times he caught himself talking to the wind, to Ray, about all the times he could remember so vividly of their time together. With no tears left to shed he began to depart from under the tree and as he came over the hill in the field his crimson eyes locked with icy-blue, looking the same as they had back in their youth, surrounded by lilac, red, and green.

"You ready to go?" Tala asked, his hands in his pockets, his hair tied in a low pony-tail that hung around his shoulder, still the same fire-red Kai remembered.

Kai nodded, gripping the handle to his suitcase a little harder as he followed the other four teens over the hill and to their car awaiting them.


End file.
